Sunday, May 8, 2011

Denial

Why is it that when someone comments on my weight loss my first instinct is to deny it? "Oh. No, I weigh the same as before." At first I thought it was because I didn't work for it and thus did not feel like any compliments were deserved. It especially bothered me when people asked what I was doing.

But I still do it. It's almost like I'm embarrassed. I haven't told anyone I'm doing Weight Watchers. Maybe it's because I was always ok with how I looked. I believed in size acceptance. I believed that diets don't work. I believed that most people gain the weight back, usually more than before. I don't even know what I believe anymore. Honestly. Now I know many people who's health has dramatically improved from weight loss. Seemingly. Including my boyfriend. It could have just been from increase in activity. On the other hand, Jeremy may not be on insulin any more, but he still has complications. Bad ones.

It's not like I was ever vocal about it. I mean, who cares if I am re-examining my stance? Nobody knows. But I know. Am I just going to be another statistic and regain all the weight? Am I being irresponsible by encouraging other people to lose weight? I just don't know anymore.

2 comments:

  1. Some people like to be private with what they do but I think it's definitely nice for people to notice your change! Even if the lb loss isn't significant, I've seen a huge change in how my body distributes weight and has toned up due to exercise so it might be because of that people are noticing for you!

    HOpe you have a great new week!

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  2. You're right that sometimes all it takes is a small loss to show up. I notice that myself. I think changing sizes is a big part of it. I have really mixed feelings about people commenting on losses though. If they just say I look great, I can tell myself they mean I look good in general. When they mention my weight though... I just feel like they must have seen me as a really fat person before. Logically I know that's kind of dumb.

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